Anyone divorced? - Sportbike Addicts

opinion914 · 11-12-2005, 08:38 PM

I havent been posting much here, or anywhere since i found out im getting divirced recently. Looks like im finally coming out of the immediate depression funk and now have to tackle the legal issues of this mess. Anyone have any recent dealings w/ this stuff? Apparently it doesnt matter what the cause of the divirce is, things still get split 50/50. Even if she cheated on me 5 times, she still gets my stuff...what kinda horsepoop is that? Looking for some advice.

**Rev** · 11-12-2005, 10:21 PM

man sorry to hear that....consult more lawyers and or PI to take pictures

CBRBob · 11-12-2005, 10:52 PM

Unless you have some sort of proof that she had caused your life to become distressed in the recent past, no PI, pics/tapes etc. will matter at all. Div is div whether you file or she does. Just try and split things up fairly BEFORE you involve lawyers, then make it official.

High_Revs_17 · 11-12-2005, 10:57 PM

Damn sorry to hear that Kev. Like Bob said if you guys are willing to do so, just work everything out as quickly and smoothly as possible. Depending on the lawyers the paperwork takes longer than anything else.

Ant · 11-12-2005, 11:59 PM

Holy shit Kev... :eek: I'm absolutely shocked...I really can't believe it. Dude, I don't have any words of advice here but seriously, give me a call. I'll PM you my number and maybe we can meet up for lunch on me.

sterling · 11-13-2005, 01:38 AM

Divorce laws vary by state. Your best bet is to consult a lawyer. When I got divorced a few years ago, we just took what was ours and went our separate ways. Of course we didn't own anything together. Our vehicles were in our own names and we were living in an apartment.

opinion914 · 11-13-2005, 08:11 AM

thanks guys, my goal is to keep this as civil as possible, we agreed on what we each get, but im afraid a lawyer willpush her to get more from me...well see. wouldnt wish this on my worst enemy

MrQuickR1 · 11-13-2005, 07:19 PM

Oh shit Kev, that's not the greatest news. I know exactly what the funk is you went through and will go through again. I'm not divorced (yet)
Keep your head up, better days are coming...I promise!

PitsVtec · 11-13-2005, 07:31 PM

Billy that's not nice..

I'm a product of a divorce and it does suck, but it is what it is. Divorce laws do vary and if you have proof of cheating or abuse, you can use that to your advantage. I work in NJ and my co-worker, who is an attorney, didn't want to be her own attorney for her divorce. She knows that her husband is cheating on her by his late nights, and expensive credit card bills. If she has any evidence of same, she can speed up the divorce and will get more of his stuff, as that is abuse to her, and their child. If they agree to have a civil divorce, the process will take longer. Talk to your attorney and your soon to be ex, on how you want to deal with this. If you need any legal advise...I'll see what I can do.

vice86 · 11-13-2005, 11:16 PM

The wife and I divorced WIHTOUT using any money sucking lawyers...it was a clean divorce, no hassles...she wanted it and as much as I didn't want to...i let her go. PA is a "no fault" state which means that if they cheat...doesn't matter...still 50/50 split.

You can file all the papers online..the divorce and the property settlement...we only did the divorce cuz we agreed on what she could take....i kept the house but had to refinance and give her 50% of the equity which was 35,000....ggrrr. A lot of sites out there that will send you the paperword.... You both fill it out, pay the courts to file it and then wait for the judge to finalize it and send you the final decree.

divorce finalized and I don't see the point of getting married...all it does is fuck you financially if you should ever divorce. Should just date FOREVER.

PSYCHO1000R · 11-14-2005, 12:29 AM

kev call me

PitsVtec · 11-14-2005, 12:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vice86

divorce finalized and I don't see the point of getting married...all it does is fuck you financially if you should ever divorce. Should just date FOREVER.

Sorry about your loss, but I'm all for marriage. I don't look at marriage as only a financially bonding, it's more than that - the money just comes with it when you get married. I want to be married, make babies and do the happily ever after thing - it's pretty much every girls' dream. I wouldn't date a flaky guy - I need to know that I could be with that guy for a long time because I hate the 1-2 month bullshit. If I love someone(Rev), I try my best to show them in every aspect. I spend my money, my time, and give them my heart to the fullest extent and all I would want in return is the same. I'm not about piggy-backing anyone...I won't take being used for what I can give someone materially, and I certainly wouldn't use a guy for what he can give me materially. That's just my point of view.

Commuta_Busa · 11-14-2005, 10:12 AM

do everything you can to keep lawyers outa the picture... even if you do negotiate things as 50/50 you'll still end off better than the lawyers sucking their huge share outa of eveything.

vice86 · 11-14-2005, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PitsVtec

Sorry about your loss, but I'm all for marriage. I don't look at marriage as only a financially bonding, it's more than that - the money just comes with it when you get married. I want to be married, make babies and do the happily ever after thing - it's pretty much every girls' dream. I wouldn't date a flaky guy - I need to know that I could be with that guy for a long time because I hate the 1-2 month bullshit. If I love someone(Rev), I try my best to show them in every aspect. I spend my money, my time, and give them my heart to the fullest extent and all I would want in return is the same. I'm not about piggy-backing anyone...I won't take being used for what I can give someone materially, and I certainly wouldn't use a guy for what he can give me materially. That's just my point of view.

well..i guess I was being a little dramatic. I'm sure down the road I'll end up getting married again...but for now I don't plan on getting married anytime soon. If you really think about it...WHY do you need to get married? Doesn't mean you love your s/o anymore then if you weren't. It's just an illusion that it must mean you love each other more then a couple dating because your committing yourself to one another on paper and crap. I don't know, like I said, I'll probably get married again but I kinda look at it differently now after going through this crap. When the divorce rate is almost 60%....that should be a sign that marriage isn't all its cracked up to be and that people use divorce too easily. Kinda hard to think...that with ALL the people in the world...you're gonna spend the rest of your life with only one person.

"Congratulations Frank, you get to sleep with one vagina for the rest of your life....way to take one for the team" - Bernard Campbell

PitsVtec · 11-14-2005, 11:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vice86

well..i guess I was being a little dramatic. I'm sure down the road I'll end up getting married again...but for now I don't plan on getting married anytime soon. If you really think about it...WHY do you need to get married? Doesn't mean you love your s/o anymore then if you weren't. It's just an illusion that it must mean you love each other more then a couple dating because your committing yourself to one another on paper and crap. I don't know, like I said, I'll probably get married again but I kinda look at it differently now after going through this crap. When the divorce rate is almost 60%....that should be a sign that marriage isn't all its cracked up to be and that people use divorce too easily. Kinda hard to think...that with ALL the people in the world...you're gonna spend the rest of your life with only one person.

"Congratulations Frank, you get to sleep with one vagina for the rest of your life....way to take one for the team" - Bernard Campbell

To each their own, but I was just saying my part. I hear you that your time is tough, and your feelings toward marriage are disgust. But I want to get married for the right reasons - not for the wrong. I know people who are married to share their life financially b/c they couldn't live alone on what they earn. I also know people who got married b/c of unwanted children. I don't want that and although, I'm young, I'm old-fashioned in marriage. I don't want to experience many men in a lifetime...I just want the one who is going to treat me the way I should be treated. I think that I'm a good girlfriend, totally honest, giving, supportive and faithful. But only one man gets those things from me and from him, I expect the same. I think divorce just sucks and I would give my all to make things work b/c that's more important to me - I mean after all you did marry that person b/c no one else made you feel the way you felt about them. But I wouldn't know how you all feel in getting a divorce, I just know from being a product of a divorce - that is sucks.