The worst day of my life
 

Today is the worst day of my life. We just found out that Kate (my fiance which some of you know) has breast cancer. She found a lump on Wed, regular doc on Thursday, biopsy Friday, results and consultation today. Shes going in on Thursday for more tests to make sure she's curable and doesn't have it anywhere else, but it's in two area's so a mastectomy is the only course of action. She seems to be taking it well, but I on the other hand am not. I just thought I'd share because it's devastatingly amazing how fast your life changes. She always jokes how I'd better die before her because she wouldn't be able to take losing me, but I'm afraid it's turning out to be the opposite.

Just found out my mother has breast cancer, she is also in the same position. But she seems to be in the Pre-Cancer stage. Found out last week. She also found another lump in her other breast now too...may be a double mastectomy....sorry to hear, wish her the best. I know what your going through so if you need to chat shoot me a PM

I'm very sorry to hear about the diagnosis, but please try
to keep a positive attitude. The right "frame of mind ",
so to speak, makes a world of difference not only for your
fiance's mental outlook, but also for her physical health.
Knowing you'll be around no matter what can make all the difference.
You will beat this, and your relationship will be stronger for it.

Oh my God, Dude I am so sorry to here that. My prayers are with you both. Good luck and try to stay possitive (I know it will be hard). Make sure you love her like there is no tomorrow.

Wow Jar...thats horrible news...something like this is definitely a life changing event, sucks it has to be under these terms though...as hard as it may be keep yer chins up.

Need anything, let me know.

Blitz,

#1 I hope everything will work out fine, I hope that the cancer is just in those to spots and its a quick and painless operation.

#2 THE BRIGHTSIDE!!!!!!! CAN YOU SAY BOOB JOB!!!!!!

A guy i worked with worked with claimed that his wife's breast cancer was the best thing to ever happen to his marriage. Apperantly she wasn't "endowed" so after the mastectomy she got the boobjob of his dreams.....she went from (I'm quoting here) "Saggy A's to Pornstar C's" ......

She's young and strong enough to fight this head on, where's her Oncologist? A full Mastectomy is the way to go and after she gets her implants she/you won't even know the difference. Hopefully it's just concentrated in her breast, it's great that she's in good spirits...mind heals the body. I'll pray for her!

I hope for both of you that it turns out well.

It may not be difficult for you guys to say straight up mastectomy but for some women the psychological toll it takes on cutting off a females breast is a great deal. We all know there will be reconstruction after surgery and then implants but that woman may never be the same again and may still never feel feminine again even after the surgery. Many women as soon as they are diagnosed are immediatly prescribed to a drug for depression such as a low dose of zoloft which is what they put my mother on.

Holy shit jared. I'm so sorry that you got this bad news today. I know kate is a strong person and if anyone can get thru it she can. My thoughts and prayers will be with the both of you.

If you need anything at all make sure you call me.

you tony danza wanna be.

But Kennedy is right, it's gonna be fucked up. Plus, the doctor said they remove the nipple with the mastectomy, so ask your friends wife to flash you and brace yourself. They might of had a lumpectomy instead of the mast, which is only removing the actual lump. But she has it in two places and the doc said it's gotta go. The hardest part for her is we might not be able to have kids because of the kemo, they doc said it's kind of a crap shoot.

And thank you everyone for your support. Kate and I both really appreciate it. She cried when I told her so many people responded already...way to go you bastards.

Sorry to hear the bad news. I hope everythig works out for Kate and that she stays strong through out the ordeal. My prayers go out to both of you and Kennedy's mom. Its crazy when things like this happen to you because you almost always think things like this can't happen to you or your family. Life goes on after things like this, so keep it positive and live it like there is no tommorow.

man im sorry to hear that J.

my mom had breast cancer, worst case scenario. your GF is still young, and hopefully she found it early enough. good luck , just be there for her and support her.

sorry to hear jared,

I hope everything turns out to be ok.

JC I'm so sorry to hear this. I too have a best friend that has gone through 2 lumpectomies, and now the Kemo (sp?) or drugs she is taking is giving her uterine cancer, I'm taking her Thursday for a uterine biopsy. No Mastectomy as of yet. Cancer is an evil thit can be beaten, staying stress free so your imune system is optimized is paramount. I have another friend who had the mastectomy and has been cancer free for 10 years. I myself have to go back next month for a second mamo because they saw something on my first. It is very emotionally draining. Tell Kate that we (all my friends and I who are fighting this thing) will pray for her. And if she needs to talk or if you or she needs anything, give me a shout anytime. 973-768-2863.
Elisa

sorry to hear about that man.

my wife had breast cancer a few years ago. she was curable as they say most are when their young, 30 and under. hopefully the outcome will be great.

Damn JC..i'm sorry to hear that....I know how it feels to have someone close with breast cancer. My aunt passed away from it years ago..but she caught it in the late stages...Another reason is that she couldn't take the chemotherapy anymore...she went for chemo and shortly after that her body gave up...again...she was in the late stages...

Nowadays they have lots of help if it's caught early. Be in high spirits...defenitly pray for her and you man...

sorry to hear....I hope you can work through it

Well only you would find humor in my post jarhead.

But let kate know that were all here for her and you. We may all hate eachother at one point or another, but were all still family.

just curious..what hospital are you guys using? I'm hoping you have insurance...cuz this is gonna be costly...something like this money should not be in the way..but its still an obstacle...

Sorry to hear the news Bro.
Thoughts go out!

Always a hard thing to take bro, and you can never truly prepare yourself for the consequences of shit like that, only thing you can do is 'always look on the bright side of loife' [/monty python]. Best of luck with all of it though dude, we went through this with my sister not too long ago, and it's a rough road, one way or another.

Hope things work out, also hoping the DR's caught everything early.
Ken

JC & Kennedy, sorry to hear this bad news. Katie and Kennedy's Mom will be in my prayers.

Holy shit dude...I'm so sorry to hear that. :( I truly hope that everything works out ok as it should. Seriously, let me know if you need anything. I think I'm going to make that donation to the Lance Armstrong Foundation so we can end this shit.

Wow... very sorry to hear.... Hope everything goes well....

Try and be strong and positive!

Jared I'm sorry to hear about Kate. If you guys need anything don't hesitate to ask. I hope everything goes well. My prayers are with you and Kennedy.

I'm so sorry to hear of your news Jared and Kennedy. I will keep everyone in my prayers. If there's anything that the SBA community can do for you, please don't hesitate to ask!

I am so sorry to hear this. :( You both will be in my prayers and as hard as it may seem... try and stay positive and look at the good things in your life together. It will help her tremendously in ways you can not believe!

Blitz and Kennedy, I wish your loved ones well. Just being by their sides and unconditionally loving them might be the best form of therapy and treatment they can receive.

Guys I'm sorry to hear about that. Cancer is a silent killer and it is horrible. My great aunt had re-occuring cancer and she is no longer with us, but lived a long wonderful life! I hope that the girls beat it.

oh man thats sucks.. BIG TIME
sorry to hear that
Stay strong the two of yous, fight it head on
BTW on a positive note i have known
poeple that had kids after kimo

Consultation was today, surgeon was 45 minutes late with no apology, papers all over her desk. Time for a second opinion.

Blitz:

How bad is the cancer? My mother found the lump in one of the ducts in the breast. Which is what I've been told is very hard to spread out of that duct. So it may be the same way with your girlfriend?

You are also correct blitz during a full mastectomy they remove the breast and the nipple and it is not saved. Even after reconstruction AND implants there will be a breast but no nipple.

In my mothers case fortunatly enough for us it has not spread throughout her breast and we may be able to get away with a partial mastectomy and make a larger incision to remove the tissue that surrounded the lump and take some medication without radiology therapy or Kemo.

How are your thoughts on this doctor? Someone may have a better route. Being that I don't know the severity of your girlfriend's case I can't really give to much input here. If worst comes to worst and Kemo and a full mastectomy is the only option I suggest you take a look at Sloan - Kettering Cancer Center in NYC. They are a more technologically advanced hospital and alot of their practice focuses on the individual cancer patient. The downside to this hospital is that alot of their research is still experimental.

My family has decided to go for the MRI that the surgeon has suggested and then depending on the results of the MRI (to see if the cancer has spread to other areas of the breast) go for a second opinion. Albeit this surgeon may be very good and know what she is doing in the OR, when it comes time to patient care concern and understanding she needs to go back to the social interaction classes of her medical school.

We have no idea of the severity yet. It's 2 malignant golf ball sized lumps on her right breast and that's all we know so far and because of the distance between them, a full masecotmy is the best choice. She's going for her MRI, bone scan, and some other tests on Thursday to make sure it's not in any other area's of her body, but the doctor feels it will come back fine. The doctor seems great, he even stayed an hour after his office hours to wait for us to get there. But I didn't particular like him though, but that's just because of the state I was in...I was ready to kill everyone in a 20 mile radius. I almost got up and left the consultation at least 4 times. My mom also recommended we check out Sloan - Kettering but I'm waiting until Thursday to see what's actually going on before I start reaching out.

And best wishes for you and your mom, we're pulling for her.

try to stay positive. hope you two make it through this!

I wish you guys much strength of mind, body and spirit. It sucks that it seems we get to hear these news so often these days. It's something hard to go through, but we get to grow through them too. This reminds me that I need to start praying again. I'll be sure to include you guys in my prayers. Keep a positive ming as many have said. A smile is a strong weapon. Good luck.

yeah sloane cattering is one of the best for cancer.. mymoms used ot work there...

Sorry to hear JC....Wishing/Praying your fiancee has a full recovery and strength to carry on and get thru this. Keep your head up and be strong for you and her. Hope all works out well.

oh my god, I am shell shocked... JC & Ken I am sorry to hear... My prayers to both... be strong... be positive... and let there be light beyond this darkness...

Sloan - Kettering is supposed top be one of the top in the nation, if not THE top, Lehigh is also a very good cancer facility, i remember spending countless days there while my mom had to get her chemo done. I hate thinking about it. If you need any contact numbers PM me.

hang in there man, and for the record, I hate all doctors after dealing with what we had to go through, so i understand what u mean, every doctor gives U differnt opinions, make sure u gys get second opinions!!!