AfricanBootyScratcher
10-20-2005, 02:34 PM
some chick just sent this to me, and I though it was pretty funny
A MAN'S POINT OF VIEW
I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women differ
so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I
have never figured out why men think with their head and women with
their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't
feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear
. "You're not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for
me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you love me for who I
am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big,
upscale department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very
expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her
we'd just buy them all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Let's
get a pair for each outfit."
We went on to the jewelry department, where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings.
Let me tell you ... she was so excited! She must have thought I was one
wave short of a shipwreck!
I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis
bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw
her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing
sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement!
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey. I don't
feel like it."
Her face went completely blank, as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
"WHAT?"
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You're not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to
satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she got this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"Why can't you love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either
A MAN'S POINT OF VIEW
I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women differ
so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I
have never figured out why men think with their head and women with
their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't
feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to hear
. "You're not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for
me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you love me for who I
am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with
her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big,
upscale department store.
I walked around with her while she tried on several different very
expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her
we'd just buy them all.
She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Let's
get a pair for each outfit."
We went on to the jewelry department, where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings.
Let me tell you ... she was so excited! She must have thought I was one
wave short of a shipwreck!
I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis
bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw
her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing
sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement!
Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey. I don't
feel like it."
Her face went completely blank, as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
"WHAT?"
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
You're not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to
satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she got this look like she was going to kill me, I added,
"Why can't you love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either